Sparky
Joined: 08 Dec 2003
Posts: 19092
Location: PDX8/6/14 10:32 AM |
Jens sez
"There's other things in life than just pushing a certain number watts with a funny colored jersey"
"This break looks good, the sun is shining, the mountain is green, the sky is blue... I go now"
"No, I actually often feel like I am coming out the other end of a meat grinder, but I can do it."
"I can go really hard for a long time and whatever makes it hard for others is good for me"
"Okay maybe, just maybe I can get in an early break again. But right now I’m pretty tired. So you better ask me how I feel tomorrow!"
___________
And I guess Chuck Norris has got nuttin on Jens either:
Jens Voigt doesn’t get road rash, the road gets Jens Rash.
When Jens Voigt rides off the front of a peloton, he’s not actually riding faster, he’s pulling the earth closer towards him.
Jens Voigt eats steak before every single ride. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.
Once when Jens put the hammer down driving the peloton, some riders just dropped off the back, others had their entire existence wiped off the time-space continuum.
The chemical formula for the highly toxic cyanide ion is JV (Jens Voigt’s initials). This is not a co-incidence.
If by some incredible space-time paradox Jens could ever race himself, he would win.
It is fact that the air within 30cm of Jens’ body remains at a constant 18 degrees C.
Jens is the permanent holder of the keys to the Pain Locker.
Jens doesn’t shiver unless it’s from a loss of blood. Even then, he keeps on riding.
Jens Voigt can touch MC Hammer.
Jens once had a heart attack on the Tourmalet. Jens counterattacked repeatedly and beat the mountain into submission.
Jens Voigt once rode so fast he traveled back in time to 1987, and shot Greg LeMond because he’s tired of listening to the guy whine all the time.
E=MC2, pain= Jens Voigt
SaxoBank mechanics removed the brake calipers from all of Jens Voigt’s bikes when it was discovered that nothing can slow him down.
Jens: noun, verb, adjective, adverb.
Jens, enough said. (shut up legs)
Feel free to add. ;)
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